"The Misfits"

Friday, May 8, 2009

Beanpie: Volume 7 Episode 1 - Operation: Beanpie


Written by Shaun Bolden
Photography by Shay Bolden



*It is Friday night, and Beanpie is in his kitchen with Lisa, Shaun, Tailgate, and Jamie. They are all sitting around waiting for the details of his plan.

Beanpie: Okay, once again mates I thank you for coming here. I know you know why we’re here and now I’ll tell you the plan. First, Ice Juicy you deliver to the store right?
Shaun: Man, my name is Shaun. Yes I deliver there, what do you need me to do?
Beanpie: Do you know anyone there?
Shaun: Yeah, I went to school with the assistant manager. I talk to her whenever I go there.
Beanpie: Ask her if she knows about any new products they’ve been getting in. Also ask if she knows about the new guy there.
Shaun: She should be willing to talk, she hates it there anyway. I should be able to talk with her on Monday. Is that all you need me to do?
Beanpie: Yeah that should be good for now. Now on to you Tailgate. Can you and Jamie keep an eye on that guy Gary? See where he lives and that good stuff.
Tailgate: You want us to follow a grown man around like super spies?
Jamie: Man that sounds like a kind of stalking I want no part of.
Tailgate: Are you serious? This has to be the most retarded thing I’ve heard of.
Beanpie: You must not have heard of your birth. You were two genes short of being diagnosed with down syndrome.
Tailgate: See this is why I didn’t want to work with you. You make the corniest jokes up and I don’t even know if they make sense, call yourself embarrassing me, and then want me to help you.
Jamie: Yeah man, you can come up with some good ideas, but when it comes to hurting someone’s feelings, you are pathetic.
Beanpie: Is that right? Do I smell a challenge?
Tailgate: That would be an unfair challenge, but since you’re willing to get embarrassed for this I guess we’ll watch him for a bit.
Beanpie: Alright then. Now Lisa, what I need you to do is get some info on a girl that works down at the store. Her name is Charlene.
Lisa: You want me to investigate some chick at the store?
Beanpie: She knew about my ideas too, and she works there at the store. Everyone in there is a suspect.
Lisa: Alright, but if she has any issues, there will be an ugly scene inside of the store.
Shaun: Wait, we all have our parts in this, but where are you?
Beanpie: I have to proceed as normal. I have an idea for a new sham govy.
Tailgate: Oh boy, what is it now?
Beanpie: Well you know how I had that fake gardening product right?
Tailgate: It wasn’t fake they got away with more of his stuff.
Beanpie: Whatever. Well, I did some research and I found a way to make some organic fertilizer.
Tailgate: Yeah, take a dump in someone’s lawn!!!
Beanpie: Shut up piglet, this is how we’ll proceed for the time being.

Scene 2: It’s Saturday Tailgate and Jamie are hanging around the basketball court looking for Gary.

Tailgate: You sure you know what this guy looks like?
Jamie: Yeah my brother pointed him out to me this morning. He’ll be hard to miss because he’s a big Lurch lookin dude with a HUGE head.
Tailgate: Aw man, here we go look who’s headed this way. The Swagtastic Darius and his No Homo Boys.
Jamie: This is not what we need right now. Wait a minute, he’s headed to the store.
Tailgate: Yeah now he’s just sitting in front of it. Is this his new spot?
Jamie: Yeah earning extra cash by carrying bags. Hey, there’s Lurch.
Tailgate: He’s walking up to Darius, and giving him money. What is going on?
Jamie: Wait, he’s going somewhere, let’s follow him.

*Jamie and Tailgate follow Darius and are led to an out of the way store house not too far from the store.

Jamie: What do you think he’s doing here? I’m not sure, but it looks like he’s getting a key from that rusty box near the entrance. Let’s go in.
Tailgate: Wait, I think we should see if they come out with anything first.

*A few minutes pass, and Darius comes back out.

Tailgate: Man, he doesn’t have anything.
Jamie: He’s headed somewhere else. Let’s see where goes.

*They now follow Darius to a surprising location.

Tailgate: This is my house!!!
Jamie: Wait, let’s see what he does

*They watch as Darius looks into the basement window, and takes a few pictures, then leaves.

Tailgate: I can’t believe this dirty gorilla is watching my brother. I am going to settle this right now!!
Jamie: Let’s go talk to your brother first, and see if he comes up with anything. It’s not like Darius is going anywhere, we know where he lives.
Tailgate: Alright, but if he doesn’t deal with him, I definitely will.

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